Everybody Loves a ClownS2 Ep2
by Bad Day at Black Rock
Summary: The guys find a hunter hangout from a message left on their dad's cell phone and meet an old friend. Sam and Dean are dealing with their dad's death in very different ways, one pulling people in and the other pushing them away.
1. Chapter 1

Author's note: These fics are based on real episodes of Supernatural. The characters and plots belong to the creator and writers for the show. If you would like background on the new character you can read the previous episodes.

Everyone Loves a Clown

She couldn't watch when they burned his body. The ritual was understandable, but she just could watch it. In fact she had broken down in tears just waiting in the car. Everything crashed so fast and there was no justice in it; they certainly didn't do anything to deserve it.

Two weeks later they were still hanging around Bobby's trying to get the Impala in working condition. Dean lived underneath that car and didn't want to be bothered with much of anything else. Sam and Kayla checked on him frequently.

"You need anything man?"

Dean rolled out from under the car and went to the bench for his next tool. "Stop asking me if I need anything, stop asking if I'm ok. I'm ok. Really."

Sam nodded but wouldn't let it go. "It's just that we've been here over a week and you haven't brought up dad once."

"Leave me alone."

"Dean," Kayla spoke with caution. "Can you stop moving for two seconds and talk about what happened?"

"She's right Dean, you can't just…"

They have _got_ to be kidding. Who do they thing they're talking to? "Yeah you know, you're right. Come here Sammy, I'm gonna lay my head gently on your shoulder. We'll cry, hug, maybe even slow dance."

"Don't patronize me Dean. Dad's dead, the colt is gone, you _know_ the demon is behind everything so say something. _Anything._ Aren't you angry? Don't you want revenge?"

"Revenge. Right, sounds good. You have any leads on the demon? Did you find another way to kill it besides the colt? No? Ok, while you're doing that, I'll be working on my damn car."

Sam grimaced, he wasn't going to get through to him. "I did find something, a message on one of dad's old phones." He typed in the voicemail code and handed it to his brother.

Dean listened to the message and handed it back to him. "So who's Ellen? Did you find anything about her in dad's journals?"

"Nope, but I looked her up and got an address?"

"Ellen like Roadhouse Ellen?"

Sam looked at her. "The Roadhouse, yeah that was the address. You know her?"

She shrugged. "Not really, I've talked to her on the phone a couple times. Some random hunter gave me the number. The Roadhouse is supposed to be some kind of hunter hangout."

Dean glanced to her and put his tools down. "Well, let's find this place. See if Bobby has an extra car we can use."

He was all over this, whatever it was. Even if it was nothing, even if Ellen wasn't even alive anymore. It was something to do, a job to distract him while he ignored what was going on in his head. This was all getting to be too much for him to deal with.


	2. Chapter 2

The roadhouse was way off the beaten path and the inside looked rougher than the outside. It wasn't the worst she'd seen, just a little hole in the wall place. Dean had wanted her to stay in the car but they were going into hunter hangout, not a vampire's nest. There was a man passed out on the pool table, presumably not Ellen.

"I'll check in the back." Sam went behind the bar while they looked around the front.

Dean suddenly felt a rifle at his back. "Kayla don't move."

She looked over her shoulder and saw a young girl with a rifle to him.

"Who the hell are you?" The girl accused, she looked a little young to be an acquaintance of John's.

"You really shouldn't hold a rifle right up to someone's back." She cocked the gun. "It makes it really easy to do this." He spun and grabbed the muzzle, easily taking the rifle from her.

The girl punched him in the face and just as easily took the gun back. Kayla's jaw dropped and she tried not to laugh, but that girl totally caught him off guard and jacked him in the face. Priceless.

Dean held his noise and called for his brother. "Sam, a little help?"

"Sorry Dean," he walked out from the doorway with his hands on his head, a woman was following him with a gun. "I'm a little tied up."

"This is the part where you come in and save us." Dean pointed out, there _was_ a reason he wanted her to wait.

"Sam and Dean Winchester?" The woman kept her aim on Sam but her expression softened.

"Mom you know these guys?"

"I think these are John Winchester's boys." She smiled and lowered her gun with a laugh. "Well I'll be damned. Hey guys, I'm Ellen. This is my daughter Jo."

Kayla reached over and grabbed a couple napkins from the bar and handed them to Dean. "You're dripping blood."

Ellen eyed her, she didn't _look_ like a hunter. "What's your name sweetheart?"

"I'm Kayla, Michelson." She extended her hand.

"Have we talked on the phone?"

Jo tried unsuccessfully to hide a smirk. "A couple years ago, remember? The little rich girl who couldn't handle her vampires?"

Kayla immediately shot her a look; she could take her, easy.

"Jo that was rude." Ellen warned her.

Dean tried not to smile at how pissed she was. "So you told our dad you could help, help with what?"

"The demon of course, I heard he was closing in on it." She noted their looks. "Why'd he send you here?"

Sam looked at the floor. "He didn't."

"He's ok isn't he?"

"No, he isn't." Sam looked ready to break into tears again, Dean was visibly struggling to maintain his composure and Kayla put a hand on his shoulder. "It was the demon, it just got to him before he got to it I guess."

"I'm so sorry."

Dean pushed her hand off him. "It's ok, we're alright."

"No, really, I know how close…"

"Look lady I said we're alright."

She looked at Sam's face and knew it was better not to press any further.

"Ash can help you. Ash!"

The man who was passed out on the pool table rolled over with a start, showing his mullet in full glory. The three exchanged looks; this was going to be interesting.


	3. Chapter 3

While Ash, who apparently really was a genius, worked on tracking the genius, they decided to do a little hunting on the side. This hunt was about a killer clowns which was completely disturbing if you asked her. The whole car ride Kayla had tried to talk to Dean, even small talk and was blown off every time. When they got to the carnival she quickened her pace to walk with Dean a few feet in front of Sam.

"Dean talk to me."

"There's nothing to talk about."

"You don't have to hide this from me, I know it's tearing you apart!"

Sam kept his slow pace behind them, but stayed close enough to hear the conversation. From the way he'd been acting, there was no way it would end well.

"Kayla, we're working." He heard her sigh and grit his teeth before stopping and pulling her face to face with him. "Look. What we've got going here is great, really. But you have _no_ idea what I've been though. So when it's all said and done, and we're over, don't be surprised."

Her mouth closed and she furrowed her brow, she hadn't seen that one coming.

"You're a good hunter, an even better girlfriend. But let's face it, you need a guy who gives a shit."

"Two weeks ago you were that guy, I thought I was important to you."

He paused. "You will never be the most important thing in my life. Not even close."

She watched his cold, unchanging expression for a moment and nodded. Suddenly the hunt wasn't on her to do list and she turned back towards the car, Sam caught her before she could walk off.

"He doesn't mean it." His voice was soft, she had to understand where Dean's head was at right now.

Kayla took another step back. "I'll be at the hotel, do I need to pack?" The question was directed at Dean but he didn't respond. "Whatever." She went back to the car.

Dean grimaced at his brother. "And here he is to save the day."

"Why'd you say that to her? You know it's a lie."

He rolled his eyes and kept walking. "Get over it."

"Dude she loves you."

"I love her. If you repeat that I swear to God I'll kick your ass. Twice."

"Then why on Earth would you…"

"Because what happened to dad was my fault!" He took a breath. "Because he loved me, and it'll happen to her too unless I push her away and it's gotta be hard or she'll come back."

"That's not fair to her man."

"It doesn't have to be fair."

"Dean, dad practically wrapped her up and gave her to you as a freakin' Christmas present. It wasn't so you could blow her off, he knew you better than anyone and he knew the risks of the job."

"Thank you Dr. Phil." He saw the Help Wanted sign on one of the tents and headed for it. "If you're so concerned about it you fucking date her."

"No, see, she loves you. And you're a complete idiot." Sam pushed ahead of him into the tent.


	4. Chapter 4

Kayla didn't even hear from them until the following morning when Sam called to let her know what happened at the house the night before. She hadn't even noticed they came and took the car without a word, it just disappeared out of the parking lot. But back to the job, the clown wasn't a ghost but it could disappear into thin air. Awhile later they showed up to see what she could come up with.

Dean tossed his wallet down on the dresser but didn't look at her. "Find anything?"

She glanced at him but didn't say anything, she didn't want to argue with him anymore.

"Great, thanks for the help." He went into the bathroom; even hotel bathrooms were cleaner than carnie bathrooms.

Kayla nodded to Sam and showed her the laptop. "I think it's these things that basically feed on human carnage. They can disappear, but to get into a house they have to be invited."

"Which is why they dress up like clowns, so the kids invite them in."

"Exactly. And they have a weakness, like everything, and it's brass. Brass whatever. Bullet, dagger, whatever sharp object you happen to find."

"Brass. That's inconvenient _and_ weird."

"I thought so."

"Where are we gonna find brass?"

Dean came out of the bathroom. "I think I know where. We should wait until tonight though, more cover, less people. In the meantime let's go find something to eat, I'm starving."

Sam glanced to Kayla. "Actually why don't I just go see what I can find?"

"Why don't we just…"

"I'll be back." He cut him off. "No sense in all of us driving around looking for a place to eat. I'll find some good burgers." Before anyone could argue he pulled the door shut behind him.

Dean stared at the closed door. _Asshole._ "Fine, I'm gonna take a shower." He went into the bathroom and shut the door.

Oh he was so not getting off that easily. She sat for a minute to think how she was going to handle this and went into the bathroom. He had to have heard the door open but didn't say anything to her, she leaned against the wall.

"You want some company?"

"Not really. Props on knowing how to catch my attention though."

She sighed. "I'm just worried about you Dean, you closed up."

"You act like that's something new. I don't know what you think you're going to accomplish but in case you haven't noticed, I'm not an emotional person."

"But you have to feel something, it makes us human. I know you feel nothing right now because of what happened, I've been there."

Bullshit. "You've been there."

"My life hasn't been all wine and roses you know."

"What, your daddy didn't get you the pony you wanted for your fifth birthday?" He shouldn't have said that. Moments later he heard the bathroom door slam. Nice going. Not forgetting what he was ultimately trying to do he finished his shower before going back into the room.

"I didn't mean that." He didn't want her to hate him.

"I know." She was sitting on the edge of the bed and motioned him to her. "Come here."

He couldn't, it would completely cancel out everything he'd said to her earlier. How was he supposed to say no to her? "Sweetheart I'm not…"

"Stop." She stood and tugged his hands so he would be in front of her. "Don't overanalyze this ok? I just want to help you deal with the nothing."

He wasn't going to argue, hell, he was too emotionally wrecked to argue with her anymore. Instead he gave in and kissed her roughly, the contact made everything else go away. Without further hesitation he pushed her back onto the bed.


	5. Chapter 5

Sam had seen a visual change in his brother when he got back with the food. He didn't know what she said to him but it seemed to have made an impact. Dean was cheerful towards them while they ate and even cracked a few jokes. Kayla agreed to let them finish the job on their own and meet them back at the Roadhouse. It wouldn't be long.

By the time they got back to the Roadhouse everything had changed. Dean had gotten quieter, his temperament had returned to this side of moody. He went back to making short, bitter comments towards him and he wished he could have called Kayla to warn her; she'd never see it coming.

Dean had enough time finishing off that nasty flesh eater to refocus his thoughts. He couldn't get distracted, the cons definitely outweighed the pros and he couldn't let a few moments of bliss keep him from what he was trying to do. She wouldn't be hurt, not because of him. He went out of his way to ignore Kayla, even though it hurt. Jo seemed to have a thing for him and he used it.

"He doesn't mean it."

Kayla was watching as Dean openly flirted with Jo, right there in front of her. Shameless. "You keep saying that and he keeps stepping it up."

"I know, but, he's dealing with dad, and he doesn't know how."

"Well I can't guarantee I'll wait around forever for him to figure it out."

"Come on, you don't mean that."

She looked at Sam, she didn't really want to leave but it was becoming a possibility. "It makes sense doesn't it? It'd be weird. It's not like I want to leave."

"I know." He paused and offered a crooked smile. "You can sleep in my bed."

Kayla laughed, she hadn't in awhile and it felt good. "You'd make that sacrifice huh?"

"Sometimes you gotta take one for the team."

She smiled softly and shook her head. "Well thank you so much for your dedication."

"I'm just a nice guy, what can I say?"

Talking to him like this now reminded her that Dean wasn't the only one having trouble dealing with John's death. She'd just been so thrown off by Dean's reactions that Sam had kind of faded into the background. "Sam I'm really sorry about your dad."

He nodded and involuntary tears came to his eyes, he couldn't help it. It was too fresh.

"If there is anything, _anything_ I can do to make this not as hard on you, let me know. I know you two lost touch and you fought but he's still your dad. You still love each other and it's terrible what happened. He didn't deserve to go."

"Geez." Sam wiped his eyes but the tears were only replaced with new ones. "Just gonna lay it all out there?"

"I just wanted you to know that you weren't alone in this you know? Your dad was a good guy, I'm really sorry."

He nodded a little, thankful to be able to talk to someone about it. "Me too."

She felt bad about making him tear up and hugged him tightly. Poor guy loses his dad and his brother can't even comfort him about it. "What a month huh?"

"What a year."

"You guys will get through this, maybe not together, but you'll get through it."

"Yeah, I guess so."

_They're too close._ That was just reaction, he couldn't help it when the thought came into his head. He argued with himself, this was what he wanted wasn't it? To push her in that direction. Dean focused back on Jo.


	6. Chapter 6

She hadn't slept well. Kayla yawned and adjusted her bag on her shoulder before heading for the car.

"Kayla wait." _It's now or never._

She stopped and looked at him, Sam walked past them and put his things in the car but he didn't get in.

"I'm sorry about yesterday, I didn't mean to be such an ass." He took her bag from her.

"I don't know what to make of you Dean, I don't know what you want. One second you're telling me I'm not even important and the next you're, well…"

"You are important to me, and it's real close. But you can't be number one, it just can't be that way it's too dangerous."

She nodded but was hurt by it at the same time. "I understand that."

"But you still hate it."

"Yeah, I still hate it."

"I want you to be happy Kayla."

"I could be happy with you." _If you'd let me._

He shook his head, he wouldn't let it happen twice. "I wish I could tell you that someday I'll be done with this and take this," he pointed between them. "More seriously, but I can't. I'll always be doing this. I'll always have to put you second and you don't deserve that."

She didn't want to hear anymore. Suddenly she wished she'd pretended not to hear him and just got in the car. "So what are you saying?"

"I don't think we should do this anymore. It's not going to turn out, and I don't want you to end up more hurt than you need to be."

Kayla jerked her bag out of his hands and raised her voice just barely below a yell. "What the hell is your problem?! Do you even _know_ how much you mean to me? How much I love you?"

He was a little shell shocked at the open outburst. _Focus._ "Baby, it's not like…"

"And you just want me to leave?"

"No, I don't want you to leave." Augh, now he was contradicting himself. Of course he didn't want her to leave. "I want you to stay, help us out. I kind of want you to stay for Sam."

"Stay for Sam."

"He needs someone to relate to, someone who gives a damn remember? That's you."

"Are you kidding me? Don't push me on your brother Dean you know I'm here for you."

Time to bring it home. He wiped the emotion from his face. "Well I'm just telling you that you're wasting your time."

She paused a moment and refused to cry, she wouldn't, not now anyway. "So you want me to stay here and waste my time."

"You don't have to go, we're just, not…"

"Gonna do this anymore. Check."

Kayla threw her bag into the backseat and slammed the door shut behind her. Without a word to Sam she put her headphones on and blared the music as loud as it would go in an attempt to drown out her own thoughts.

Dean got in and started the car. This shit was getting too complicated.


End file.
